#im feeling very sad and low today :((

[thedrotter]

re:kinder doodle dump part three !!! drawings with wildly different moods www they are more polished ans complete than my other doodles because. why not🥺!!!

[bunnyboy-juice]

i love when friends :3c

[barkingangelbaby]

venting so much i ran out of tags lmao

[ichigosoju]

🍡

[whatevertheywant]

Although enjoyment:(

[neos127]

enhypen x gn!reader | vulnerable moments

enhypen showing vulnerability in your relationship genre. fluff, some angst, hcs + established relationship cw. none!

heeseung

your boyfriend nearly laughed in your face when you suggested to give him a bath. ‘i’m not 80’ he drawled, causing you to roll your eyes. heeseung had been complaining about his body being a bit sore so you wanted to help him feel a bit better.

“let me take care of you…you never do.” you pouted, pushing heeseung in the direction of the bathroom.

“is this just a plot to get me to take my clothes o-” you shut the door in his face, telling him to get undressed. you had already prepared the bath tub for him, knowing that even though he would probably protest at first, you would get him in there somehow.

once heeseung called you back in, you giggled at the sight of him surrounded by bubbles. he looked relaxed, despite fighting the idea before.

when you knelt down next to the tub, you began to run soap over his body. you stopped to massage his shoulders a bit and heeseung hummed with content.

“didn’t know i was at a spa today.” heeseung joked, causing you to pinch his side. he yelped and turned his body to face you, a shocked expression on his face.

“shush, hee.” you giggled, turning him back around to continue washing him. after you were done, you handed heeseung a towel and walked out of the bathroom to give him privacy. for the rest of the night, you decided to pamper him. even doing his skincare which heeseung appreciated very much. he relaxed into your touch, smiling up at you as you applied lotion to his face.

“i love you alot, you know?” heeseung spoke up before placing a light kiss on your hand. you smiled back at him.

“i love you too.”



jay

“why do you always act that way around him?” you sighed, facing your boyfriend who looked just as upset as you were. the two of you had come back to jay’s apartment after meeting up with some friends, one of them being a guy that jay didn’t like. he claimed that your friend actually had a crush on you, he may have been right but at the moment you were too upset to care.

“it doesn’t matter if he likes me or not, im dating you!” you exclaimed, tired of the argument that wasn’t going anywhere. jay was fuming, pacing back and forth across the kitchen floor.

“it does matter! what if you see how great he is after hanging out with him so much? what if you see how much better he could be for you than i am.” he replied, his voice cracking a bit. all anger you once had suddenly vanished and instead you felt sad. jay was jealous, sure, but only because he hadn’t felt secure in your relationship.

you wordlessly walk over to jay before wrapping your arms around him into a hug. he immediately reciprocates, not being able to stay mad at you for very long.

“sometimes i feel like i’m not good enough for you.” he mumbles, his grip still firm around your waist. you pull away slightly to look at his handsome face, smiling at him reassuringly.

“you’re more than enough. you’re everything to me, jay, please don’t ever forget that.”

jake

jake was sure he was in heaven, his head resting on your stomach as your fingers ran through his hair. jake let out a few low hums, his eye closed as he basked in the feeling of having you with him. the boy was fully relaxed and completely at your mercy, but he was comfortable. jake always felt comfortable around you, enough to even let you baby him a bit.

“you’re so tired, huh? had a long day?” you asked softly, your voice nearly a whisper but your tone was as if you were speaking to a small animal. jake knew his friends would have a a laugh if they saw him like that, responding to your words as if he weren’t a fully grown 21 year old.

“mhm.” he hummed in response, snuggling his head impossibly deeper into your hoodie, the one that smelled like your sweet perfume that he adored so much.

sunghoon

you walked into your boyfriend’s room, expecting him to be sleeping or playing a game on his computer. you didn’t expect to see him simply staring out his window, playing with his hands idly.

“sunghoon?” you broke the silence, causing your boyfriend to look at you with a sad expression. you immediately rushed over to him, sitting next to the boy on his bed.

“what happened?” you ask, brushing a loose strand of hair away from his eye. sunghoon takes a deep breath before explaining everything to you— how drained he was, how at times he felt as if he wasn’t good at what he did. he poured out his heart to you, telling you exactly how he felt. he suddenly became choked up, his eyes watering with unshed tears. and then, sunghoon began to cry.

you froze, not knowing how to react considering that you had never seen your boyfriend cry before. he tried to cover his face, but the way his shoulders shook and the sounds of soft cries filling the room showed that he was truly upset. the sight broke your heart and you immediately pulled sunghoon into your chest. he wrapped his arms around your waist, crying into your shirt.

“it’s okay, it’ll be okay.” you mumbled softly as you ran your hands through sunghoon’s hair to comfort him.

sunoo

towards the beginning of your relationship, sunoo had been very hesitant with affection. you two would hold hands and exchange soft kisses, but he hadn’t been one for cuddling and long hugs.

one day, to your surprise, sunoo decided that he wanted to be extra close to you. the two of you were resting on the couch watching a movie and you had decided to lay down. sunoo laid down behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist burying his face into your neck. you tensed at the sudden action, not expecting your boyfriend to cuddle you. sunoo thought you were uncomfortable and went to pull away.

“no! you can stay like that- i was just shocked that’s all.” you spoke up, placing his arms back around your waist.

“im sorry that i haven’t been as affectionate.” sunoo sighed, tightening his hold around your waist. you smiled and pushed yourself further into him, feeling warm and comforted in his embrace.

“don’t apologize, sun. i love you regardless.”

jungwon

jungwon appearing at the doorframe of your dark room did scare you a bit. he had just stood there quietly, similar to horror movie characters before they attack their victim.

“you okay?” you asked your boyfriend before sitting up from your bed and turning on the small bedside lamp. a frown was evident on jungwon’s face, his eyes glossy.

“not really.” he tried to crack a smile, which looked like more of a grimace. you extended your arms, a silent invitation for jungwon to join you. the boy slowly trudged over to your bed, plopping himself down on the mattress, half of his body ontop of yours.

jungwon explained everything to you, how he felt and how his mental health had been affected recently due to his stress. you listened attentively, letting him rant to you, even if some of his words became a jumbled mess. as soon as he was finished speaking, he slumped into your body, the weight of his bottled up feelings had finally been released.

you ran your hand across his back and held him close, feeling happy that he decided to open up to you. during your relationship so far you had never had such talks with jungwon. but it seemed as if you were turning over a new leaf.

riki

he just couldn’t take his eyes off you. you were so gorgeous, adorable, pretty— any similar word riki could think of. you looked up at your boyfriend, dropping the lego piece that you were holding in your hand. usually riki looked away when he caught you staring, but this time he met your gaze.

“what?” you asked sharply, not meaning for it to come out that way but you suddenly felt self conscious due to his eye contact. riki didn’t take your tone to heart, simply shrugging his shoulders.

“i love you.” he mumbled, still looking at you from across the set of legos you were both building. you paused, your stomach exploding with butterflies.

“i love you a lot and you mean everything to me. i know i probably don’t say it often, but i just wanted you to know. i hope to be by your side for a long time.” riki added on, suddenly becoming shy and looking away. you smiled before crawling over to riki and pulling him into a hug. the boy had never been so open with you before but you appreciated it greatly.

“i love you too, ki. i promise to be by your side for a very long time.” you replied, pulling back slightly and holding your pinky out. riki looked down at your hand and chuckled before linking his pinky with yours.

taglist — @boyfhee @junityy @aenify @iilwji @catzisb1og @greentulip @starantulas @jakesangel @heeblurs @pshbites

[eomayas]

chasing pavements • hjs

pairing: husband!joshua x wife!reader, parent au

genre: angst, hurt/comfort

synopsis: just reader and joshua being parents

warnings: parental woes, arguments, past childhood trauma, girl-dad!joshua, their child is nameless and is called ‘baby’

a/n: the people asked for dad!shua but nobody said which kind…🤭 anyway this was v random and is very parent-y so beware!

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

sighing out a deep breath, you open your eyes and try to make your voice as gentle and even as possible. “i’ve asked you to clean up your mess three times now, baby. i’m not going to ask you again,” you stop stirring the spoon in the pot to look over your shoulder at her. she’s busy dragging her crayons over a coloring page, not bothering to look up at you.

“but im not done!” she whines, bottoms lip jutting out with the beginnings of a tantrum. you tense and and blink a few times as she just whines, tiny hand holding the crayon tightly in her hand. she’s not even coloring inside of the lines, just streaking the colors over the sheet haphazardly.

“dinner is almost ready. clean it up,” you voice is stern, tension in your tone rising as well as in your posture. you grip the ladle tightly in your fist, your other hand braced against the kitchen counter. “if i have to ask you again, then-“ the consequence dies on your tongue at the sound of the lock clicking and the front door opening. she gasps and shoots up from the table, loose crayons scattering across the wood floors.

“papa!” she shouts, running down the hall to greet joshua. you close your eyes and push out a breath from your nose. your jaw is tight as you turn back to face the stove. “look at what i got from school today! oh, and you missed seeing soobin today!”

“yeah? what is it?” he’s pressing a kiss to her cheek as he enters the kitchen, making her giggle when he blows raspberry against her skin. joshua sets her down so she can run to her backpack. “hey, baby.” he says, a hand sliding around to your hip and his lips pressing against your jaw in a greeting.

“hey,” you shrug him off of you and turn the burner down to low heat. “uh-uh, you can show daddy after dinner. go clean up,” you say, stopping her short when she comes back with a paper from school clutched in her hands.

that bottom lip juts out again and her eyes dart over to joshua for help. it only frustrates you more, because all three of you know that she has him in her palm. “well- joshua, stop.” you bark, throwing your arm out to the side to push against his abdomen. “go clean up the table so we can eat dinner.” her eyes well up with tears, and you feel like the biggest asshole in the world for making her cry. you remember a brief moment of yourself as a child and being scared each time your father asked you to do something. he never had to ask you or your siblings more than once—you all found out the hard way—and worry that you’re doing the same thing to her.

she huffs and spins around, her walk mopey as she puts her paper back into her bag and starts to slowly pick up the crayons. you feel joshua start, his hand gently pushing yours away as he makes his way over to her. “i’ll help you, princess,” he says and you grit your teeth.

“joshua, stop! i’ve asked her six times now, she needs to listen!” you’re on the brink of snapping, another word out of him or her is very likely to send you over the edge. it’s rough. the day was shitty from the jump, but you didn’t think it would be this bad by the end.

you expect joshua to at least have your back when you put a number on it, he looks over at you before glancing down at your daughter with sad eyes. “y/n, she’s just a baby.”

“goddamnit, joshua! let me do this!”

and then the dam breaks. her wail ripples through you like an electric current, setting off all of the alarms and signals that let you know your daughter is in trouble. except, you put her in this position, and now your heart has sunk to your stomach. joshua hurries to pick her up, cradling her against his chest and smoothing his hand over her hair. you stay rooted at your place by the stove, ignoring the sting in your nose and the newly formed lump in your throat. joshua shushes her softly like he used to when she was much smaller, but she just keeps wailing.

her cries slice through your heart and shred it to pieces. you want to walk over to her and hold her, tell her that you’re sorry, but you don’t think it’ll help. “baby- i’ve got it,” joshua cuts you off this time, cutting his eyes at you as he keeps trying to console her.

it only frustrates you more, and your anger is misplaced when you spit out, “deal with dinner, then. since you’ve got everything,” and storm out of the kitchen, your heels punctuating the end of the conversation. you fly up the stairs and into your bedroom, kicking off your shoes into your closet.

you stand there, in the middle of the walk-in, with your hands on your hips as you take in deep, shuddering breaths. your vision blurs with tears that you don’t let fall, instead blinking them away as you try to regain control over your breathing. her crying face swims through your mind and you almost forget why you’re so upset. almost. but unlucky for her, you’re not as easily swayed like joshua is.

grabbing a sweatshirt and a pair of pants off of their hangers, you quickly undress from your work outfit, and pull onto the much more comfortable clothes. you shove your feet into a pair of sneakers and push out a breath. her cries echo through the house, and you wince at her gasping breaths. it’s muffled, but you can hear joshua trying to calm her down, though whatever he says makes her let out a piercing wail that makes you flinch. it all feels too much; your guilt, her crying, your frustration at the both of them for different things.

you slip out of the bedroom and move as quickly and quietly as you can down the stairs. you force your eyes away from the kitchen and grab your purse off of the accent table in the foyer, and leave the house without a word.

i’m just like my father.

the thought rang through your head the the moment you pulled out of your neighborhood. it almost brought you to tears, but you managed to keep them in again. and you almost turned back, but couldn’t. you have the harrowing realization that the more you fought to be better than him, you ended up a mirror. it makes your stomach flip and turn, but yet you still don’t turn around.

time is a flat circle.

there’s not a place you’re heading for. you’ve just been driving on the back roads for nearly two hours. the sun set a long time ago, and now the sky is dark and unwelcoming. you should go him, you know it, but facing your husband isn’t something you feel up for at the moment.

turning into a dimly lit convenience store parking lot, you pull into a space and out your car in park. you sigh and lean back against the headrest, shutting your eyes and reminding yourself to breathe. you visualize a square and practice the breathing exercise your therapist taught you. in for four, out for four, her voice echoes through your head. it calms down the storm brewing inside of you and brings you back down. that voice in the back of your head, the one telling you that you’re just like your own dad, gets a little quieter.

your phone buzzes in the cup holder, and you pick it up.

joshua: you don’t have to tell me where you are, just lmk that you’re ok.

you: i’m okay.

you gnaw on your bottom lip, deciding that it’s time to go home. it’s past your daughters bedtime now, and you can guarantee that she’s already tucked in and asleep. at least you won’t have to deal with the both of them tonight.

on your way home, you pass a donut shop that is surprisingly open. you stop and quickly run in. the pastries surprisingly look fresh for 8pm, and order half a dozen of your daughters favorite (chocolate with sprinkles, and maple), before heading to the car to make your way home.

the stress of the day starts to weigh on you halfway home. the morning started out rough; joshua had to go into work early, so taking your daughter was your duty. from the moment you woke her up, she was in meltdown mode. you take the blame for rushing a seven year old, but you let her have juice in her lunch instead of the usual water, so you figured that it evened everything out. but then you were late from picking her up from the after school program she sometimes goes to if neither you nor joshua can pick her up, and she whined about it the whole way home. never mind the fact that your workday was filled with hour-long, unnecessary meetings.

you yawn as you pull into your neighborhood and up to your driveway. you stall in the car for a moment, looking at the dark house in front of you, save for the bright porch light. there’s a chance that joshua has gone to bed, but in your heart of hearts you know that he’s waiting up for you. deciding to just deal with your life, you grab the box of donuts and your belongings, and get out of the car.

you quietly make you way into the house, lightly shutting the front door and locking it behind you. just the sight of the kitchen makes you tense, and when you walk in you’re met with a clean kitchen table and floor, no signs of there ever being a previous mess. you put the donuts away in the fridge to keep them fresh.

with a sigh, you exit the kitchen and start up tje stairs, footsteps light just in case the stairs creak. you step into your bedroom with a quiet sigh, and shut the door. the light from the en suite bathroom shines through the cracked door, and you can hear joshua in there. grabbing some pajamas, you pull on a tshirt just as joshua comes into the room. “hey,” he says, voice soft.

“hi,” you tug the shirt over your head and toss your other clothing items into the hamper. he lingers near the bathroom door with his arms crossed over his chest, watching you as you make yourself busy with little things.

“we need to talk about earlier,” joshua says. you don’t look up at him as you apply hand cream.

you take a moment before responding. “okay,” you breathe out, roughly massaging the lotion into your skin. you hear joshua shuffle on the other side of the room.

“you can’t yell at her like that,” joshua says gently. you sit up and stare across the room at a family photo, blinking a few times.

“i know. but i asked her six times to do something, and she still didn’t even do it. you need to let me discipline her,” you say, finally looking over at him. he uncrosses his arms to run a hand through his hair, letting out a sigh as he does.

“she’s just a baby.”

“she’s seven.”

“she’s a little girl, honey,” joshua says, like that changes anything. you two are usually on the same page when it comes to disciplining her, though she doesn’t really get disciplined because she’s an good kid. you thought he’d understand your frustration today, but he doesn’t and you feel like your back is against the wall.

the fight in you is gone, though a flicker or your earlier anger lights inside of you upon hearing him talk. “okay, and i shouldn’t have to tell her to do something six times. she should just do it the first time,” you say, looking at him pointedly. he pokes his tongue in his cheek, and you know he doesn’t agree with you and is holding back whatever he wants to say. “and, i don’t need you to step in when im trying to teach her something. you need to let me parent her.”

“are you implying that i don’t parent her?” he asks, head tilting to the side. you squeeze your eyes shut and swallow the frustrated groan at the back of your throat.

“i’m not implying anything. im telling you that you need to let me teach her things, without interrupting me. because she’s going to think that she can get out of everything if she looks at you,” you say. joshua purses his lips and looks down at his feet, nodding slowly. “you have to stop babying her, joshua.”

asking him to do that is like asking him to recolor the sky: it’s impossible. one look at her and his entire backbone shatters. it’s sweet sometimes, until you need him to enforce some rules.

“fine, alright? but you can’t yell at her like that. you heard how she cried afterwards,” he says, his voice less gentle than before. you blink at him and drag a hand down your face. you’re ready to put this conversation to bed—nothing feels like it’s going to get resolved tonight. “she was scared, baby. remember that night when i met your dad? she had that same look on her face.” your stomach drops at the memory.

the first time you let joshua meet your dad was also the last time he saw him, until your daughter was born. you were in college, and had only been dating joshua for a few months, but you felt so sure about him. he was the first person you felt so sure about, and it scared you, but you felt like in order for joshua to understand you and to love you, he had to meet your dad. he’d met everybody else in your family, but you were putting off him meeting your dad because of how your father is. the night started out fine, everybody was generally getting along with each other and joshua was fitting in. you were on edge, worried that something would happen so much so that you weren’t able to relax. you were running around trying to help your mom with the kitchen, be a good host to joshua, and avoid pissing off your dad.

and then it happened. you can hardly recall the reason now, since you’ve really tried to block it out of your memory, but you forgot a dish, or burned something that he wanted in particular, and he flipped out. you were in your twenties, so you didn’t have a problem standing up for yourself at that point. but because your new boyfriend was there, and it was humiliating that he was yelling at you like that in front of company, all you could do was cry. you begged him to stop with tears streaming down your face, begged him not to say things in front of joshua. he ignored your pleas as they only made him explode. joshua tried standing up for you, but your dad yelled at him too, claimed joshua was ‘disrespecting’ him, and told him to get out.

joshua left but took you with him. he kissed your mom and siblings goodbye, and whisked you out of the house. you were so embarrassed that you could hardly talk through the tears. you expected joshua to break up with you after that, and managed to ask if he was going to leave you. he stayed and proposed to you five months later, and you quietly eloped together, only a few of your friends knowing about it.

“i’m not like him,” you say, throat closing. joshua’s face falls and his features soften as your eyes well up with tears, already moving to walk over to you.

“no, you’re not,” he clarifies, sitting next to you on the bed and pulling you into his chest. you press your fists into your eyes and try to control your breathing while he softly rubs your back. “i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to upset you.” joshua whispers, kissing your head as you tremble in his arms. he keeps his lips pressed to your hair and lets you fight the tears, never once letting go of you.

your eyes ache from pressing against them and you pull your hands away, sniffing and trying to pull yourself away from him. joshua only holds onto you tighter which makes your eyes well up again, and you can’t believe you’ve been brought to tears more times tonight than in the year so far. “i left,” you mumble weakly.

“you came back.”

“but i left.”

joshua pulls back enough to look down at you. you look up at him with sad eyes and he lets go of you to wipe your face. “and you came back. you’re nothing like him, baby. you’re a good mom, a good wife, and you care. you left, but you came back. water under the bridge,” he says, pushing your hair out of your face. you blink tears away as he peers down at you before leaning down to press a soft kiss to your lips.

“i love you. and im sorry,” you murmur, wiping under your eyes.

“i love you too, and we both have things to work on.”

you nod, and let him hold you until you eventually doze off, headache and all. you only wake up in the middle of the night because you’re uncomfortable, and move to your side of the bed. joshua still tugs you back into his chest and the two of you mange to stay that was until the morning.

when you wake, joshua is right behind you. he talks you down when you panic about facing your baby. “does she hate me?” you ask, wiping sleep out of your eyes.

“of course not,” he says, a small frown on his face. you want to tell him to wait until she’s a teenager, but he looks distraught enough at your question, so you just nod.

she’s asleep when you peek in her room, sprawled out on her small bed. you creep over quietly and kneel beside her, gently shaking her shoulder. she wakes up easily, stretching her short limbs before she opens her eyes. “mommy?” she mumbles, rubbing her eyes with a small yawn.

“hi, baby,” you say, smoothing a hand over her head. she looks up at you timidly, and your stomach knots. “did you sleep okay?” she nods and you give her a small smile. “mommy’s sorry, baby. i didn’t mean to yell at you.”

“it’s okay,” she says, sitting up. it’s not, but you’ll take her accepting your apology. “can i have a hug?” her voice is small, and makes you want to cry because she doesn’t have to ask you for that.

“of course, baby,” you say, wrapping yourself around her and pressing a kiss to her cheek. your hold her for awhile, until she starts to struggle against you. “i got you something.” you say once you loosen your hold around her. her eyes light up and you smile, scooping her up and heading downstairs.

you pull the box of donuts out of the fridge snd she gasps when you open the lid. you let her have a whole donut for breakfast, and promise her half of one after dinner. you apologize again, and she tells you that it’s okay again. one day, you’ll let her know that she can’t just say ‘it’s okay’ whenever somebody apologizes, but for now you let it be.

[bunnyb34r]

Tried again and got through 🤙 appt made now I can nap 🤙🤙

Cool cool cool got a sharp migraine and every time I call my dr to make an appt (not ab the migraine) I get through to the office but it's just a busy signal once I hit the menu number I need 😠 what the fuck man

[fnlbeautifca]

its getting close to my birthday and i have brainrot soo DOL LIs when its your birthday!!

if not specified, it will assume highest love :3c for some (great hawk specifically T_T) im not 100% sure on, so im sorry if its not accurate to the character… i did my best…

alex: most likely forgets about it until they check the calendar for today while making breakfast. i think they would make pancakes with a heart shape drawn on the top :3c the day is the same as any other, except by the end of it they give you a gift that is of your imagination ^^

avery: i feel like they might take you on a date, but actually ask for preference this time. it really depends on how much they like you… miiiight get you some flowers or maybe some nice jewlery

black wolf: doesnt really understand. but happy to spend the day with you anyway ^^ theyre just a little guy dont fault them here..!! maybe theyll bring you a dead deer or something

eden: probably got your birthday info from bailey, and makes you their best attempt at a cake. im not sure how good at cooking/baking they are, i hc them as being good at making edible, necessary foods like stew (but thats off topic!) i think they would make their best attempt at a small cake, and of course youd spend the day together. MIGHT indulge a night on the town if you ask really nicely and they like you a lot

great hawk: brings you nice little trinkets as a gift and maybe somehow steals a sweet treat from a [convenient place]… maybe flies you around a little. very romantic

kylar: obviously already knows its your birthday whether you told them or not; gives you a gift tailored to your exact interest/or needs at the moment + flowers and a cute card. insists that you spend the day out with them… please go out with them. they will be sad T_T

robin: gives you a handmade gift + card… if able to, they might buy you something small (cheap stuffed toy or maybe a book you mentioned to want)… they would like to spend the day with you and would be overjoyed if you invited them out on a birthday outing :3c

sydney: (p!syd idk how c!syd acts im sorry…) depending on their love, as a friend theyd get you a card and small gift. with higher love, theyd still get you a gift and a card and maybe some flowers… they also want to spend the day with you, and if you want to go out with them on your special day, theyd be over the moon :3!!! i imagine a romantic stroll on the beach…

whitney: last but not least!!!! depending on their love they might not know or care. if they know its your birthday and theyre at low love and high dom, theyd probably make you go out and do some mischief with them. with high love, i can see them getting you a cheap gift (probably a stuffed animal tbh) and flowers IF theyre feeling especially nice today. what are you looking at them for? its no big deal. they dont even care about you. they just felt like it today. for no particular reason. :3c (still makes you go out with them for a birthday date. if its a rainy day i can see it as a romantic walk in the park with a couple of milkshakes. simple! but thats okay :3c)

[ilwonuu]

hii can i request a fic with bf!dk/mingyu with a reader who has problems with food or low self esteem?? if you are uncomfortable just ignore it, thnks ! 💗

yes of course!!! i choose dk for this but i think im gonna write something for mingyu too<3 i hope u enjoy and ty for requesting ily💖💖

𝟣𝟩

⇝ 𝗅𝖾𝖾 𝗌𝖾𝗈𝗄𝗆𝗂𝗇

❣︎ 𝗉𝖺𝗂𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀- 𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖺𝖻𝗅𝗂��𝗁𝖾𝖽 𝗋𝖾𝗅𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗉， 𝗇𝗈𝗇𝗂𝖽𝗈𝗅！𝗌𝖾𝗈𝗄𝗆𝗂𝗇 𝗑 𝖿𝖾𝗆！𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋

❣︎ 𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌- 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿<𝟥，，，𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝖺𝗒𝗌 𝗂 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝗒𝗈𝗎<𝟥， 𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝗐𝖾𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍， 𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝗅𝗈𝗐 𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿 𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖾𝗆， 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝖺𝗌 𝖺 𝗁𝖺𝗋𝖽 𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖿𝗈𝗈𝖽， 𝗌𝖾𝗈𝗄𝗆𝗂𝗇 𝗂𝗌 𝖺 𝗌𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗍𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗍（𝗁𝖾’𝗌 𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗅𝗒 𝗌𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗍） ， 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗒 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝖺 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌𝖺𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇 𝖺𝖻𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗁𝗈𝗐 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝖿𝖾𝖾𝗅𝗌， 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗒 𝗄𝗂𝗌𝗌 𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾 𝗈𝗇𝖼𝖾， 𝗅𝗆𝗄 𝗐𝗁𝖺𝗍 𝖾𝗅𝗌𝖾

❣︎ 𝖺／𝗇- 𝗂 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗐𝖺𝗌 𝗈𝗄𝖺𝗒 <𝟥 𝗌𝖾𝗇𝖽 𝗂𝗇 𝗆𝗈𝗋𝖾 𝗌𝖾𝗈𝗄𝗆𝗂𝗇 𝗋𝖾𝗊𝗌 𝗂 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝖽 𝗐𝗋𝗂𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌：（ 𝗌𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗍𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗍 𝗌𝖾𝗈𝗄𝗆𝗂𝗇 𝖺𝗀𝖾𝗇𝖽𝖺 𝗎𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗅 𝗂 𝖽𝗂𝖾 ，，，𝗇𝗈𝗍 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗈𝖿𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽 ,,

today was a very hard day. you don’t know how your mind got to this point. the mirror was provoking you. you were feeling a little bit bad about yourself lately. you lost your appetite.

your boyfriend, seokmin had invited you to his house for lunch. he had been cooking incredibly dishes for you. you agreed of course because you miss him a lot. you drove over to your boyfriends house with a little bit of fear.

you knew seokmin could read you perfectly. he knew when you felt even a little bit off. you arrived shortly with a sigh. you knocked on the door trying to shake your negative thoughts away. he opens the door with a big smile.

“hi angel.” he pulls you in quickly.

“you got here at the perfect time! i just finished cooking our delicious lunch.” he pulls you into a hug as you look over to see the food already plated. your heart drops a little but you just figured you can say you’re not hungry or something.

“oh! seok i’m not really feeling hungry but maybe i’ll eat later.” you smile at him softly as he looks at you for a second before nodding.

“oh alright- i thought when i texted you earlier you said you haven’t eaten today?” you don’t look him in the eyes fully as you shrug. he just chuckles before grabbing both of your plates.

“you’re not skipping meals right love? eat something.” his voice is soft as he sits you down next to him.

“minnie- i’m really not hungry it’s okay.” he shakes his head quickly.

“what’s wrong angel? you always eat lunch when i cook it for us.” his hand is on your side gently. his full attention is on you. you thought that you could at least get 10 minutes without him catching you feeling not the best today.

“nothing is wrong seok- i just really don’t want to eat anything right now.” he sighs at you but nods his head.

“okay- but you know you can talk to me. i won’t judge you at all. you can tell me what’s wrong.” you feel like you could cry. his voice is so comforting but it makes you really sad to hear.

you don’t want him to worry about you but you know he will no matter what. you know he doesn’t have a reason to judge you or your appearance. he always makes sure its known that he thinks you’re very beautiful.

“well- minnie i just haven’t been feeling the best about myself lately. i’m having a hard time not thinking about weight every time i eat. i just have really low self esteem.” he listens to you closely as you open up to him.

he feels happy that you feel comfortable enough to talk to him about your true, very real feelings that anyone can feel. he loves how vulnerable you are with him.

“i don’t know how much words can help you feel better but you are so beautiful. it wouldn’t matter how much you ate or how much you didn’t eat you are an amazing person. you are not your appearance at all. even though your appearance is absolutely perfect to me. you are the best person on the inside. you’re beautiful no matter what to me. i really wish you could see yourself how i see you. i know how it feels not have a hard time with food and i just want to say that you are doing perfect the way you are. you don’t have to change those habits at all to be beautiful. im not trying to say you shouldn’t feel this way im just telling you how i see you and don’t feel like you have to always be okay with yourself because i’m not always okay with myself either. just know that i’m always here for you and i will continue to be here every time you feel like this. i will always be here to tell you how perfect you are.”

you literally couldn’t hold the tears in anymore. you were sobbing in front of him. he was quick to wrap his arms around you. he hug was so comforting you didn’t ever want him to let go.

“don’t cry my love. i mean it you are completely valid for how you feel.” he can’t let you catch a moment to stop your tears. you were so thankful for him. he always knew the perfect thing to say to help you feel better.

“can w-we eat seok?” you say in between sobs as you pull away to look at him. he kisses your head with a nod.

“of course angel. i love you okay?” he rubs your cheek as he hands you your utensils.

“i love you more minnie.” you wipe your tears as you focus on the food. you already feel better about eating just with his presence. you truly wouldn’t know what you’d do without seokmin. he is truly everything you had wished for.

“i’m proud of you for telling me. no pressure on finishing your food. each as much as you’re comfortable with.” god you just want to marry him. is that insane? maybe a little bit insane. you pull him into a kiss. you kissed him for longer than he expected.

“thank you for making me feel comfortable.”

[sukunas-play-thing]

Birthday Kisses and Cake

Sabo x Oc

my birthday is today, and im feeling a little at my lowest, so this is mostly self comfort and self indulgent. Feel free to read if you like regardless. slight dark themes, hurt/comfort, mentions of death, it's OC based, but you can read it as reader if you want Thank you.

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this also includes a little bit of Gravity Falls sprinkled in there, mostly bc I'm a sucker for multiverse work.

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Birthday Kisses and Cake (Sabo x Selim)

she woke in a good enough mood, she had well rested rest with Sabo next to her. She knows she did, she didn't fall asleep upset.

The night before, was spent watching her best friend play the newest game release, Sun Wukang, before she had taken a break to check on her lover, Lindberg. Leaving Sabo and Selim alone to chat about anything and everything, Sabo had found Selim's criminal record she had gained during a summer vacation one year with distant family, and Sabo spent most of the time reading them off, laughing, and asking her what half of them meant, or what on earth prompted half her arrests. She'd laugh, explain things.

"Sweetheart, you've gotten 32 counts of murder!?." Sabo gasped looking at the paper in his hands, he lays on his back on the bed, Selim, tucked under his arm with his arm wrapped around her waist to pull her closer. She groans as she hides her face in his chest. "I told that officer Durley, they were zombies! No one believes me!." She would say.

Sabo couldn't help but laugh at this, rolling his eyes. He never realized the women was such a criminal, nonetheless. "Okay..um..what's "pug trafficking" ?." He asks her as his eyebrow raises. Selim was quick to respond with her ppunter finger up. "That. Was all Grunkle Stan! I had nothing to do with that!." She says, oh so matter of factly. Sabo let out a hearty laugh.

He liked her crazy shenanigans. It reminded him of simpler times, when he was younger, and spent his childhood time with Luffy and Ace, she reminded him a little of the two. Her hot headed and aggressiveness similar to Ace, to her bright and happy smile like Luffy's. Sabo felt warm, whole, contented in this very moment. He threw the papers on the ottoman by her bed, and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to his chest, hugging her so tight she'd groan in protest. But he ignored it. He placed sweet kisses to her head, before he'd mumble, "You know what tomorrow is?." He asked her, She hummed in response before she began naming off possible scenarios, holidays etc.

"Umm…. memorial day?." Sabo shakes his head, she pouts. "It's not your birthday… That was in March…" She mumbles to herself, Sabo chuckles. "It's not our anniversary… is it!?." She's quick to panic at the notion that she had forgotten, Sabo was quick to comfort her. "No darling, think harder." He simply says, as he softly pokes her nose. She scrunches her face in mock annoyance, before thinking to herself again.

"Is it Luffy's birthday???." She asks. Wrong, she's so cute when she's clueless, or forgets things, especially like days like her birthday.

He shakes his head and sighs, playfully rousing her hair. She slaps him. "Get some sleep darling…We have a long day tomorrow." Is all he says, she goes to say something but Sabo's soft smile, and his finger to his lips in a gesture of silence, stops her. she pouts again, nuzzling to his side, and finally falling asleep.

She slept good, she did, she had a good night.

So why does she feel this way? This feeling of inadequacy?

Low, sad and broken?. She turns to her side, seeing Sabo had already gotten up for the day.

She sighs and plops herself down on the bed again she feels heavy like weight sitting on her chest. Refusing to let her move. She groans at this and forces herself off the bed, rolling to the side. She reaches for a cigarette. She's out. She sighs before getting up to find herself some caffeine. Only to open the fridge and see she has no more monster. She slams the fridge shut. She walks back to her room to get dressed, She'll just walk to the store real quick. No biggy!

She gets to the store, grabs three cold cans, and then heads to the counter to get some smokes for herself and her friend. "I need to see some ID." The clerk asks, rather rudely, in Selim's opinion, but she ignores it and realizes quickly. She didn't grab her ID. She groans and tells the clerk to just scan the drinks, please. Selim walks back home, the sky is cloudy, bleak, and a little bit of a sprinkle of rain begins. She whimpers. She makes it back to the house, grabs her ID, and storms back to the store. gets them finally, and walks back home. By now, she's sweaty and a little cold from the soft patters of rain hitting her seething body. When she gets back home. She goes straight to her room, and anger boils down to a deep depression. 'Ah, so it's gonna be like that.' She'd think to herself as she sits down, she's been wanting to get back into writing again, Similar to Sabo, he inspired her to want to write a book about her life, the people that's impacted her. But words aren't wording. And she groans annoyed yet again and walks away from her project.

She sighs, lighting the lighter that won't work so she throws the lighter and sits there in silence for a moment. She takes deep, even breaths to control her rising anger and frustration. Her den den mushy rings, and she leans over to grab the receiver. 'Cuhlick.' The sound emanates.

"Hey Sissy!!!." It's her twin brother, Elliott. "Hey Bubba." She says softly, feeling a little calmer now. "Happy Birthday." He says, and it finally hits her, 'Ah, that's what Sabo's behavior was about last night.' She muses to herself. She shakes her head in deep thought. Her silence muses her brother, as he chuckles on the other end.

"You forgot, didn't you?." He says, a slight tease to his tone. They talk a moment. Luffys voice is on the other end, demanding he speak to her. "HEY MILLIE HAPPY BIRTHDAY." Luffy hollers. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DUDE BROOOO. I hope you have a SUUUUUUPER BIRTHDAY." That was Franky. She can see in her head the commotion Elliott must be surrounded in. Everyone crowding him and yelling in his ear. All the strawhats wishing her a happy birthday, wishing they were there today. Luffy asks to tell her he said hello to Sabo when she sees him again. Selim nods. When things die down. It's when Elliotts tone changes to a somber one. "Hey, um, by the way. I found a voice recording from our late friend and crew mate, it's for you. He sent it Before he died and im just now finding it.." Elliott speaks. Before sending selim the voice recording. She opens it up, says thank you to her brother, and hangs up. She curls into herself as the voice recording plays.

Voice recording:

"Hey, kiddo, it's me. Ches, Listen, I heard you've been having a bad day today. And I just wanted to say that I am proud of you. I know sometimes life can be hard, it can be really hard. But just know this, you're stronger than you give yourself credit for. And to always be kinder to yourself. You have an amazing brother who'd do anything for you. A bestie whose your ride or die. And your brothers crew and me. Who'd give you the whole world. Always think of the good things life has given to you. Always remember how far you've come, regardless of how hard it was to be on this earth you still shined bright. Still got up in the mornings to tackle the day. And still has a heart full of love. So. Please, go take a hot shower, put on your favorite clothes, make your room dark, put on your favorite show or movie. And remember, that you are number one. Thank you for being in our lives. See ya later, kiddo! "

Selim didn't realize that she had been crying. Hot tears fell from her face to her knees. She missed him so much. And every day, she's grateful to being on this earth because of him. Hearing his voice was weird, considering he'd been dead for two years. He fought his battle and lost, and here he was, still encouraging her to keep going herself. It was the hardest bit of reality she's ever faced. She broke down. Sobbing uncontrollably when her bedroom door opened. Sabo had returned from running errands with Lindbergh and selims best friend. Seeing her in this state caused Sabo to drop everything and rush to her side. Checking her to see if she was hurt physically. Only to see she wasn't.

This pain was emotional. So he did what he knows best. He wrapped her in his arms and held her so tightly. In his signature, bone crushing hugs. He let her cry. Let her cry all of what she felt out. Closing his eyes and choking back his own sobs. He hated seeing her this way. Seeing her cry made him cry. Even though he wanted to be strong for her above all else. But she's taught him to be vulnerable when it was just him and her. And so he did. When she calmed down. He asked what was wrong. To which she told him she received the voicemail she had never gotten until now. Sabo knew of their old crew mate. They talked about him often. How kind he was, how selfless he was. And how it tore their crew up when he passed. He understood loss all too well. He fixes her hair. Wipes her tears. He holds her hands in his gloved ones.

"Darling... I want you.. to have the best birthday ever, let's get you cleaned up. Me, you. Lindbergh and your friend are all going out for your birthday. I, want you to know. We're happy you're here. Happy birthday sweetheart. The most very special lady I've ever met."

She swooned at how sweet and thoughtful Sabo can be. She shakes her head, thinking she couldn't be presentable. But Sabo disagrees. He helps her up, indirectly giving her the strength she needed to move again. His strong arms hold her upright, his strong legs, helped her walk, his strong hands wiped her tears, and his sturdy chest grounds her. He grounds her.

He helps her get cleaned up. He helps her get dried off, She fixes her hair. And dots her lips with a soft color tint. She picks out her outfit and sprays her favorite perfume. Her friend and Lindbergh are waiting in the living room when Sabo and Selim emerge together. She wears soft colors and a beautiful shawl Sabo bought for her birthday today. A dark blue laced color that matched her dress wonderfully. The four set out for the day to have lunch and then to walk along a beach shore. They call the strawhats and her brother back, and they all sing happy birthday to her as she hides her face bashfully. The sun begins to set. And they go out to dance. The lights and music soothe her weary soul. Sabo looks absolutely handsome in his blue black suit. He kisses her full of love and adoration as the song ends. And when they walk back to the house. They are greeted with the entire revolutionary army members. All with their own, specially wrapped presents, just for her. Ivankov made a beautiful pink and purple cake. With 27 birthday candles on it, with the words; "Happy Birthday, Millie!"

Gracing the decorated treat. They all sang happy birthday. Selims a giggling mess as Sabo sways side to side with his arm wrapped around her. His voice, a soothing balm, calming her tumultuous waves of pain and anxiety, and washing it all away with just a simple look. His charming smile, makes her heart flutter. She wraps her arms around him as he places many kisses on her face as the song concludes. Everyone's clapping and cheering. And when it was time to blow out her candles. She thinks for a moment.

There's nothing to wish for. She has her friends, all here. Her brother is alive and well and with the strawhats. Luffys is happy, her friend is happy. And Sabo, sweet, caring, funny, darling Sabo. Is right here with her. Her whole world was crashing down when she met him. And he's slowly building her pieces back together again. Even if he doesn't realize it. She smiles and kisses his chest. And blows out her candles. Everyone cheers and claps again. Before music begins to play.

"Thank you, everyone."

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I'm sorry this was sad. I don't know why I'm feeling sad hut here we are. Thank you so much for reading. Have a lovely day/night mootisies.

[stillfrownyclownlol]

Hiding in the bathroom from a man rn lmao

Aidlyn headcanons because...please? Please? They make me sick /positive

These aren't all fluffy or whatever because they traumatized af and relationships like that are...difficult... but not impossible.

-he's 8-ish months older than her and like, 20ish cms taller (sorry I don't know how American feet work lol 😭)

-He hyperfixated on the relationship lmao.

-Clingy...they BOTH are. In different ways I mean but. They are both clingy. They're scared the other is gonna die when they aren't around lol 🙃 Aiden is ofc very touchy and grabby, he just has to FEEL that she's with him. Also type of guy to call at 2am "hey bby u good?". Ash gets antsy if she hasn't seen or heard from him in a while (a while means like 2 hours) especially since he like spam texts her every 5 seconds. But he also hyperfixates or disassociates for a while and will forget 🤡 like she will yell at him about why he didn't call her for 17 hours and he'll just be like "um sorry. I was. Staring at a wall."

-he has a lot of weird/cringy ass pet names for her that makes her want to slap him; probably calls her Bae or whatever. Ash nicknames for Aiden: Idiot, stupid, dumbass, public safety hazard...called him "dear" like once just to try it and hated it. "Mr. Durable" if she wants to annoy him.

-worlds worst pick up lines. Ash NEVER understands them.

-he loves surprises! Surprise him! He wants to surprise Ash too! She kinda hates this. They decided to "compromise": he will tell her beforehand that there is a "surprise" and gives her little clues/puzzles so she can figure out whatever it is. He has like 0 patience tho so he always helps her figure them out 🤡 Ash likes watching him get excited about the puzzles and doing them together more than the surprise half of the time.

-Him infodumping is like white noise so she can sleep lol.

-they try to do things the other likes since Ash thinks this is important for a "healthy relationship". Almost died when they went to an indoor rock climbing place 💀 but she got to see Aiden in a leotard when they did ballet together so it was a fair trade (blackmail)

-he is her hypeman at ballet recitals, will probably cheer when she comes on stage and has a sign and everything, the rest of the gang (and Ash) is just like "...we don't know this guy"

-she wishes he took care of himself more. Sends him stuff like "did you drink any water today", "Ben told me you're gonna skateboard down the hill please dont", or "IF YOU SET YOUR BOOKS ON FIRE IM GONNA CALL THE POLICE" <3

-sometimes if she's sad she just kinda. Falls on his back. Like a koala or smth. She has that "I literally cannot do anything" sort of depression (which to be fair Aiden also has sometimes). Aiden carries her around.

-when nobody's looking she kisses his cheek, cuz she knows his face is usually sore from smiling so much.

-pretty low key on her part, but Aiden is so obvious everybody knows 💀 She doesn't like PDA (more so the fact that people stare) but Aiden will usually put his arm around her shoulders or waist/give her a smooch (not on the mouth) <3 it's honestly not that different from how he was when they were just friends ngl 🤡

-he says "I love you" easily, because it genuinely is the easiest thing in the world for him. He has 0 doubts about how he feels for her. Ash doesn't say it a lot cuz she feels weird saying it, so she does her best to show it in other ways.

-he gets jealous easily *siiiiigh* It's cuz he's insecure!!! Help him! 😭 He doesn't get annoyed with her because like. Ash pays about as much attention to other guys (I mean besides Tyler, Ben and Logan) as she does to dust. But he will death glare at any guy they don't know that's staring at her 💀

-kinda codependent... *looks at the floor* they are working on it. Sometimes Aiden feels like he's only alive for her. (I- Look at episode 61- IVE BEEN IN HIS POSITION. AIDEN BABY THIS AINT HEALTHY)

-absolute dork. Draws "A.C. + A.B." in a little heart in his note margins because he's goofy like that.

-he fell first she fell harder NO I will not be taking any criticism for this.

Anyways it's raining outside so I'll just post this now

[hyukasluvr]

Bye, angel

✧ pairing - Taehyun x reader

✧ genre - angst, hurt/comfort, fluff

✧ warning - talking about the death of a dog and a mild argument, and i think that’s it if there’s anything else let me know please!

✧ summary - in the middle of the day you get a call which you think could be one of the worst calls you’ve got in your whole life… you receive the worst news and it gets you really upset but you don’t want to let taehyun know about this… he’ll just think you’re stupid, right?

✧ a/n - this is very self indulgent since i recently had a situation like that.. only i didn’t have a taehyun to help me through but anyways, i’m sorry if i misspelled anything, whatever thoughts u guys want to share with me please do, and now enjoy!

that was one of the worst calls you could ever receive. if not the worst one.

your mom has just called you to give you one of the worst news ever… it was your dog, your dog that had spent his whole life with you was now gone.

you were in utter shock. it was just a week ago that she had called you to tell you that your dog was at the vet and now he’s gone?

this just all seemed like a cruel joke, it didn’t feel right to think that your small ball of fur which you had spent your entire childhood with was now completely gone

you wondered if calling taehyun to come home and be with you would be a good idea… but it wasn’t, was it? wouldn’t taehyun just think you’re being dramatic? it’s just a dog isn’t? wouldn’t he be embarrassed of you bothering him at work just cause you were sad over a dog?

your head kept running around these thoughts. and now you were left there all alone holding back tears, cause even tho you were home alone. if you cried, your eyes would get puffy and taehyun would notice right away.

taehyun was out for practice and wasn’t coming back home until very late, and you were glad he wasn’t here he didn’t have to know this happened and everything would be normal, right?…

you decided to keep your mind busy by watching tv, although you knew your mind was never gonna focus on the show you put.

hours later taehyun arrived home, tired but giddy cause he’s finally seeing you after a long day of practice

"hey love! i brought some takeout” he said when he spotted your figure in the couch

"mhm” was all you answered. still lost in your own thoughts, just looking up at him once you saw him approach the sofa

"are you okay y/n? you look kind of lost” he asked while sitting down next you on the couch

"i’m great. why would i not be?” you said, regretting it a second later cause come on. what was that type of answer. ugh.

he chuckled and just pulled you up from the couch "okay then, let’s go eat before it gets cold”

you followed along sitting down in front of him.

"so um… how was your day?" you asked him.

"well it was quite stressful im not gonna lie, today we had to run over the same choreography for so long i feel like the song is still on playing in my mind right now” he chuckled and looked up at you smiling.

you smiled back at him but your eyes didn’t match your smile. your eyes looked empty and sad.

taehyun knew something was up but you didn’t want to tell him so he had to find out someway

"and how was your day, honey?” he asked before taking a bite out of his food.

"it was okay. i just did some laundry and went out to the convenience store to buy a drink" you said while poking at your food plate.

"oh! and how’s your doggie doing?” he asked looking at you expectantly

suddenly you stopped poking your food and just stared at the plate without saying a single thing. you kept your head low cause you did not want to risk looking at taehyun and immediately breaking down.

him on the other hand. he watched you intently waiting for an answer but growing more worried by the minute because you seemed to be frozen.

"love? is everything okay?” concern was evident in his voice but you refused to look at him, but you just couldn’t react and give him reassurance that everything was fine, cuz for you it really wasn’t.

"y/n! hello?” he got up from his chair and walked around the table to sit down at the chair beside yours.

he moved the plate away from you and he took the fork out of your hand so he could grab your shoulders to face him.

you felt how he moved you but you still decided not to look at him, you were not going to break down so easily. let him think you’re stupid and childish for crying over a dog? you refused to let that happen.

"love, i need you to tell me what’s wrong so i can help you” damn it! he made it so hard for you not to comply, his sweet talk got you weak to the point you almost fell… but you didn’t.

instead what you said really shocked him.

"it’s none of your business.. why do you care?”…

as those words left your mouth you felt instant regret for hurting him. he only wanted to help you but this was the only way to avoid the situation. you pulled your hands away from him and stood up to leave the table, but taehyun stopped you by grabbing your hand and standing up in front of you.

"what has gotten into you y/n? when have i not cared for you??” he was getting a bit irritated and you noticed it in his tone.

"nothing has gotten in me, why can’t i be serious for once? do you think life is all rainbows and unicorns? WELL ITS NOT!” you yell out.

you once again pulled your hand away from his and started to make your way to your shared bedroom. leaving taehyun utterly shocked at your behavior but he was definitely not gonna go after you until he heard a loud thud from your direction.

you were so mentally and physically tired from hiding your pain and your tears that as soon as your foot touched the first step of the stairs, your whole body gave up on you and you fell to the floor finally letting out that painful sob you had been holding in for what felt like an eternity.

taehyun didn’t hesitate to run to you and help you up, but your body was too weak so instead he positioned himself at the floor of the staircase and put you on his lap hugging you so tight that you felt like you could finally let it out.

minutes and minutes passed by and u couldn’t calm down, taehyun didn’t hurry you to say a single thing… he was just there telling you "it’s okay, love, let it out don’t hold back with me, i’ll be right here” which just made you more sad and mad at yourself for trying to shut him out when he’s so sweet to you.

after what felt like hours, you finally felt calm enough to tell him the truth. you looked up at him and he swore he could feel his heart break at your tired and sad eyes looking all red and puffy from crying so hard, he hated seeing you sad but this time it was different… he had never seen you in such a state that he felt totally broken but he was always gonna be strong for you if that’s what you needed.

"taehyun… my dog, my angel, my baby… she’s… she’s gone. forever.” you said trying to hold your sobs in, of course failing miserably.

he heard that and immediately hugged you tight as ever and said "oh my god… i am so sorry baby, i know how much you loved her… i truly can’t imagine the pain you must feel right now, angel. i really wish i could take it away from you”.

you separated from him for a minute to look at him to keep talking, he never let you go tho, still holding you in his arms but always ready to listen to you.

"i’m so sorry for the way i acted towards you right now-“ you saw him open his mouth to protest but you quickly told him "stop, im not finished” he closed his mouth almost immediately which made you chuckle.

"i acted that way cause… i don’t know why i felt like you would find me to be a bit childish for crying over a dogs death like if it was a person, i know you said you’d never judge me… but i felt a lot of things today after getting the news, so i really am sorry, tyun. you didn’t deserve that” you finished looking up at his eyes after trying to avoid eye contact for a while but his eyes never left yours… he was looking at you so fondly that you could honestly melt.

"sweetheart, don’t apologize! i can totally understand that when you’re upset you sometimes don’t even know what to do with all of these feelings you get and sometimes they get the best of you. but believe me. id never ever think you’re stupid for crying over a dog… especially a dog that meant so much to you and that was your partner in crime for almost your whole life” he chuckled lightly and so did you but still feeling a couple of stray tears run down your face. taehyun brought his hands up to your face and wiped underneath your eyes to take away every tear he could before continuing.

"i think you’re such a strong person for putting up with such rough paths life gives you, i am really really proud of you, love” he hugged you once again and whispered a quiet 'i love you' against your ear and you said it back before giving him a sweet little peck on the lips. "alright how about we finish eating our dinner while watching a movie, do you like the idea?” he said, now standing up and helping you stand up.

"i actually love that idea, mr. kang” you tell him teasingly. "well miss l/n, why don’t you pick a movie while i go reheat our food since i’m pretty sure it’s cold by now”.

"that sound great" you tell him before going to the couch to pick a movie to watch together.

both of you ate dinner together while laughing at a stupid comedy movie you found there, feeling so much better after everything that happened, and feeling like you’ve learned a lesson that after that you’d never hide such things from him, cause he’ll always be there for you.

[sophisticatedgia]

Hewo y'all. How y'all doin?

I walking back to boyfriends after the grocery and before that, the gym. Today I drank my orange dreamsicle caffeinated beverage and was very orderly and content during my workout. Didn't get the urge to stop at all. A blessing!

Sun shining, me smiling, birds squeaking, cars roaming.

My boyfriend wanted to meet me on his e bike to carry our groceries. But I enjoy walking *very much* and writing. Laughter and snort. I used to prefer cycling but I now prefer walking. It keeps me level and grounded and human. ~* I'm on earth! I'm with earth! We are alive! I am alive! Yay! *~

I feel so positive. I wonder if my diagnosis of schizo affective disorder is correct, it's a mix of bipolar and schizophrenia. I felt quite low and a bit sad last night. But waves of motion electricity are natural when involving self with another.

I am trying to learn to be more forgiving, less jealous, more accepting, less fearful, and more humble. That's just the way it is. When I run into conflict I get deep sadness. It is totally not "spiraling into depression"...or madness... It's just me having deep energy and motion within and outside of me.

So yes y'all today thus far I am very satisfied and happy. Sigh of contentment, relief. I got an anonymous ask and im refraining from posting it for now. But if it's the person the person I think it is, I wish you peace, health, creativity, and happiness.

In fact if it's any one else, at all, I wish you good health and happiness.

I am praying for us all.

[irrealisms]

for the character ask game to match/complete the others: ItzSubz?

took me a while to get around to this but!! yes!!!! 3/3 eclipse fed ask game babyyyyy

How I feel about this character

i am less insane abt him than i am about vitalasy & zam but this is a low bar. i care a lot about him. i think a lot about how fucking lonely he is, and how .. fundamentally all he wants in s4 is to live happily with his friends and for them to not hate each other. and instead everything falls apart. and he doesn't know how to fix it but he figures it must be his fault and he kills himself about it and this ... looks like it might fix it, for a bit, but that. really does not fix it either. he makes me sad :( in other seasons he . exists i guess. sorry im not a subzguy (void chara voice Some crimes can never be forgiven (not true void would never say this bc theyre too polite))

All the people I ship romantically with this character

vitalasy. zam. uhhhhhh. yeah that's kind of it

My non-romantic OTP for this character

not sure i have one tbh. the vitalasubz relationship is so romantic & i feel like i dont have a great grasp on subz's relationships outside of eclipse? which tbf for s4 at least this is bc. he is in fact very isolated for a lot of it! and i know his s4 better than his other seasons lol

My unpopular opinion about this character

this is going to be a bit of a reiteration of several of my other unpopular opinions abt other characters I WANT TO READ HIM BEING MORE ABLEISTTTTTT IN FIC like i dont think it's unpopular per se to go "i think that subz is ableist". i think this is an extremely popular opinion. but the general outlook on this is that when fans write him they write a version of subz that isnt ableist. which is like. fair. not everyone wants to write the amount of ableist that subz is, especially because the thing with subz is that c!subz is only ableist bc cc!subz is irl ableist and gets defensive about overly triggered snowflakes when people call him on it. no one should. like. feel obligated to write characters being ableist if they dont want to lol. but also. c!subz is ableist! i want fic that is in character & that includes wanting portrayal of subz being ableist, and as a crazy person i like fic that is willing to explore ableism. i also understand that some ppl probably dont want to write it if they ~cant reclaim~ it but as a certified schizo i am giving everyone who reads this post permission to write subz calling people schizo esp if you're writing canon/non-au. he does that! in canon! a lot! and tbh i feel weirder abt ppl erasing subz's ableism than i do abt ppl writing fictional characters who use the word schizo lol

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

i wish that in the vitalasy stream today we had gotten a conversation between subz&zam&vi or even subz&zam instead of subz and zam only ever talking to vitalasy one-on-one and otherwise politely avoiding each other....we could have had it aaaaallll (eclipse federation screenshot in 2024)........

(ask game, give me a character)

[lovers-rck]

medicine to the heart | spencer reid x fem!reader

summary spencer goes to check on you when you feel down

pairing spencer reid x fem!reader

warning lots of cuteness

wc: 1.1k

☆

"hey"

The room lacked natural light. Thick curtains covered the windows and prevented the sun's rays from streaming through the window. With narrowed eyes, you followed the voice with your gaze.

Standing in the doorway of the room, wearing his distinctive socks of different colors, was Spencer.

"you didn't have to come" you said in a whisper, the sheets covering your body.

"i wanted to come" he said.

Curls adorned his face and caressed his cheeks. His hair had grown quite a bit in the last few months. With slow steps, Spencer paced around your room, his eyes on every object that came in his way, examining it for long periods of seconds even when you could barely see anything.

You had no exact reason to be as you were. Lying in bed, with the sheets wrapped around your body and deprived of sunlight, these were simply periods that attacked you for no apparent reason. Waves of sadness and demotivation took over your whole being and you could do nothing to stop it, just wait for it to pass.

That episode was being the longest, you hadn't been to work for days and even though Hotch had given you the week off you felt terrible for missing it. Every day you would wake up thinking about the lives that were lost while you were lying in bed unable to help.

"did you eat something today?" spencer asked, pulling back the curtains and inviting the sun in.

The light stabbed your eyes. Everyone at the BAU knew about these episodes and how they could affect you, but lately Spencer was the one who showed the most concern, visiting you and helping you with the paperwork on your desk, for which you were immensely grateful.

"not yet" you said "but I was going to do it now".

"don't lie" he said, looking at you.

The light softened his features. He was wearing the FBI vest under his jacket, and as bad as you were in the mood you could still see how good it looked on him.

"im not lying" you were "how is everyone?"

"fine" he said, walking around your bed to where there was an empty space. "they miss you"

You smiled at that. You loved your job and you loved the people you work with "i miss them too".

spencer nodded and put his hands in his pockets, silent. From your point of view, you could see perfectly well his attempts to concentrate on anything else.

"can you laid down with me for a few minutes?" you said "it's okay if you don't want to"

Spencer looked surprised at your request. It didn't hurt to point out how little experience he had with women other than in the workplace, and he couldn't help but admit that you had a charm of your own.

From the moment he walked in he tried not to look at the way you were lying in bed. The way the sheets hugged your body and how your loose hair swam across the pillow. There weren't many times he could see you as a normal person, without the formal fbi suits and impeccable hair. Seeing you like this felt intimate.

With timid steps, he approached your bed. Part of the mattress sagged under his weight, but he remained seated.

You laughed lightly "i'm not going to bite you, Spence."

Spence

He nodded slightly and dropped gently onto the mattress, his muscles were tense and his body was in front of yours, inches apart.

"thank you agent" you said, and Spencer felt his cheeks redden slightly.

Spencer never felt so unintelligent as he did when he was with you. With others it was very easy to impress and act intellectual, but with you all his barriers came down and he didn't feel so confident anymore. You opened a door of intimacy that he didn't know how to handle.

But he wanted to learn.

"thank you for joining me" you murmured, playing with your fingers and nails and avoiding his gaze "i really appreciate it".

"i know you do" he murmured as low as when children shared secrets with each other.

"i hate feeling like this" he looked at you, your fingers digging into the skin surrounding your nails "i'm useless, and i don't know how to stop it"

"you're not useless"

"i feel like it"

Without thinking twice about what he was doing, Spencer rested his hand on top of yours to stop the way you were hurting your fingers. He had long noticed your tendency to play with your nails and fingers when nervousness came over you.

Spencer's body heat embraced your body and you realized how close you were to each other. His hair was sprawled across the pillow. the disarmed curls, permeating your pillow with their scent. His thumb lightly caressed your hands, in an act that not even Spencer himself was aware he was performing.

When your eyes met his gaze, his pupils were dilated and danced between your lips and eyes slowly.

"um..."

"can you kiss me?" you murmured, in a thread of a voice that only spencer could decipher.

You didn't know if this was all from your imagination or the fever you had suffered the night before, but the next thing you could feel was Spencer's lips against yours. His warmth invaded your lips as his body positioned itself on top of yours, being extremely careful not to squeeze you too tightly.

Your hands hovered over his hand and face, too shy to make contact with him. Spencer's kiss was slow but deep, his hand resting on your jaw, leaving your face at his mercy and driving you as he wished.

Without meaning to, little moans escaped your lips which Spencer smothered with his mouth. Your mind could not comprehend how the Spencer you saw every day at work was the same one who at that moment had total control over your body.

His grip was firm but delicate, his free hand traveled down your abdomen caressing every inch of exposed skin, flesh warm to his touch.

His lips left yours for a few seconds in search of air. Facing each other, the two of you sought to catch your breath, hearts galloping, threatening to burst out of that shell made of ribs. You could still feel his hands creating small circles on your skin.

Spencer kept his eyes closed for a few seconds, where you could observe in detail every inch of his features, how his eyelashes rested on your skin and his lips searched for air.

Watching him was like medicine to the heart.